


Let Him Kiss Me

by Sandpipersummer



Category: The Charioteer - Renault
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-23
Updated: 2009-12-23
Packaged: 2017-10-05 02:48:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/36968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sandpipersummer/pseuds/Sandpipersummer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A few kisses</p>
            </blockquote>





	Let Him Kiss Me

**Author's Note:**

> I had mostly written this but was in need of a theme and title, and I came across a gay interpretation of the Song of Songs, at http://thewildreed.blogspot.com/2008/04/song-of-songs-bibles-gay-love-poem.html, which I found both interesting and appropriate

**With the kisses of his mouth**

_That's all, goodbye. What is it, then? Come here a moment……_

Laurie wasn't sure what he expected to happen in the moment proposed, but having Lanyon's mouth pressed against his own was as far from his thoughts as anything. He closed his eyes, and a deluge of emotion burst forth, his senses flooded with feelings that had, he now realised, been waiting patiently in hidden recesses ever since he had first seen Lanyon so many years ago.

Warmth radiated from the other boy's mouth, burning his lips, and shivering across his skin before sweeping down his back to where a steady hand held firm: a shield protecting them both from the world outside the study door. He mustn't drop the book, he thought, trying to latch onto something real in what they were doing, then jerking away suddenly when greeted with the overwhelming knowledge of what he and Lanyon were actually doing together. Laurie wanted to tell him that it wasn't him or the kiss, just the surprise, and the realisation that this, this… The brief flicker of hurt that shadowed Lanyon's face disappeared quickly behind a return of the cold, almost angry, gaze that had greeted Laurie when he arrived, and he lost his nerve.

_'Now you see what I mean, Spud. It would never have worked, would it? Well, goodbye.'_

'But when can we--'

'Goodbye.'

**In his delightful shade I sit**

_When she said goodnight she kissed him, very lightly but with more tenderness than she had shown him since he was a child._

Ralph drew back, the slight sense of guilt he felt about taking advantage of Spuddy as he slept washed away by the deepening realisation that he was being given another chance. Perhaps there was such a thing as luck, after all.

**Sweet to my taste**

_'Spuddy. You mustn't worry the way you do.'_

The voice was kind; but there was more than kindness in it. It struck the sounding-board of Laurie's loneliness and his will died. Ralph's arm was lying along the back of the pew, but he didn't move it. Laurie could just feel his shoulder and that was all.

Ralph kissing him reminded Laurie of when they had last been alone together like this. It imbued in Laurie an immense feeling of sadness; even now he couldn't tell Ralph how he had felt then and still felt, only more so. At school, he imagined, it must have been the sheer unexpectedness of what was happening, but now? Now he knew he wanted Ralph with him at the wedding, knew that Ralph wanted him to say yes. But he could only deny them both. In the study, Ralph had held him, drawn him in, and taken charge. This time Laurie was left to take his own responsibility, just as he'd asserted once that he could. Part of him fought this self-knowledge, but he mustn't allow Ralph to change his mind because of a weakening sense of conviction that he was doing the right thing. He drew away, Ralph's arm still on the pew, his own limp by his sides.

**My love is mine and I am his**

_'Do you believe in luck?'_

'I'm a sailor,' Ralph said.

He hadn't meant to, but safe in the shadows of the cedar and enclosed by a silent calm that held in abeyance any concerns of being seen, he felt as lucky as any man could be at a moment such as this. It seemed that nothing could touch their happiness. Leaning across the air that trembled between them, he placed a gentle kiss on Laurie's forehead. Then, closing his eyes, he lowered his head and kissed Laurie on the mouth.


End file.
